The Dislocation of Relocation

When you are relocating, the challenges and disruptions you face are often unexpected and disorienting. Even when you choose a move, you can find the ensuing adjustment to a new home and new community to be demanding and jarring in ways you had not anticipated.

Choosing change does not in anyway mean the change won’t be traumatic. Often, we don’t anticipate the level of trauma that the change causes us. This can results in an internal judgment that makes it difficult for us to take care or our needs. When your response to the move is not the positive feeling you had anticipated, your fear that you have made a mistake can leave you unwilling to take care of the feelings you are having.

As a sensitive person, there are often many more facets to separating from a place or from people, and to settling into a new place than one ever envisions. Allowing for a much longer adjustment period than expected – a time that may be filled with grief, fear, anxiety and disorientation – can go a long way to helping you reorient on physical, emotional, mental, energetic and spiritual levels.

We may find that what we moved for is not actually there when we arrive. Yet, with time, we may find other unanticipated benefits to the move. We may find that there are variables we never took into consideration (including such elements as noise, new neighbors, geomagnetic stress or an outgassing house). The effort to address these stressors is an added discomfort we may not have anticipated.

If we are being forced to leave a place to which we are attached because of economic changes in circumstance, job loss or transfer, family crisis or other external factors, it may take a great deal of time to actually leave behind the old life and adjust to the new one. We can be haunted for years by what we have not truly let go of in the place we had to leave.

Regardless of the reason for the move, if we can name the things that are causing us great discomfort (whether emotional or physical factors), we are better able to take are of ourselves. When we can honor what we miss, and adapt our old habits and activities that brought us pleasure and meaning to the new place, we are better able to integrate the changes. Missing a place, or a house, is not the same as identifying what we miss. Once we name what we value, we can find ways to honor the loss.

Sometimes, we do not miss the things we thought we would miss. Or, if we do, we find new and surprising delights or advantages we had not anticipated. We may miss the charm of a turn-of-the-century home, but we may love the clean new house that is easy to heat!

If you are highly sensitive, energy work or body work can be very helpful in helping you ground in the new place. This work can also help you release old patterns of attachment that are keeping you in the past.

Leaving a place you love and people you love does not mean you do not care about what you are leaving. Just because a move is right or necessary, does not mean it will be easy or that people will support you in your decision. Often, a relocation is a huge process of clearing old patterns and adjusting to new paradigms or energetics of a place, a community and the physical environment. Making these changes can exert huge demands on your energy field and your body.